Parenting?

I brought Daiyan to tea with my lab mates today since we were celebrating one of the students who has just finished her PhD. Since I have to take care of Daiyan every afternoon onwards, and it's just tea anyway, so I thought, why not.

I arrived a bit late; our chief scientist had already started giving his speech. So I just walked towards them, pulled a chair, and sat. Then everyone started to notice Daiyan. And being Daiyan, he started smiling to everyone. Everyone was just surprised that he seemed very happy. A few people came to me and said "He is such a happy baby. You must be a good mother." "Thanks," I replied.

So I wonder, is a happy baby a sign of good parenting?

Probably. I am not sure myself. The truth is, I don't know why Daiyan is so happy around people. I always thought that it's just who he is. I am not doing anything extraordinary at home. But alhamdulillah, I think he is quite a content baby--whether or not it's because of our parenting--he smiles and laughs a lot (although he protests a lot too), and I can easily leave him by himself/with other people when I go to social events (dinner party etc).

I remember the early days when Daiyan came into our lives..lots of people told us (me, especially) not to hold him too much as he would grow up wanting to always being held, not to nurse him to sleep lying down as he would be accustomed to it, to give him pacifier and formula milk as I am a working mom and it would be hard for the care taker (and me) if Daiyan wouldn't take pacifier or formula milk. But the weird thing was, people also told me no to give him the pacifier as it might be hard for him to wean off it when he is older.

As a new mother, I tried following the advices (except the formula milk..as I know I want to exclusively breastfeed him). I tried to put Daiyan down as much as possible, tried to rock him to sleep instead of nursing him, tried to give him the pacifier..but none of this felt right to me. Daiyan loved to be held a lot when he was a newborn, and he loved to breastfeed every 2 hours, one-hour long every session (which means I only have at most, 1 hour break), so putting him down and rocking him to sleep would usually result in him crying. Daiyan also hated pacifier--he would spit it out, usually as soon as I put it into his mouth--so the pacifier basically ended up not being used. In the end, I held him as much as he needed, brought him to sleep in our bed and nurse him to sleep, and let him suck on my breasts for as long as he needed. This way, he turned out not crying as much, and kept all of us happy.

I remember at one point I wanted to train Daiyan to sleep in his cot because as much as I love him, I also wanted to maintain the relationship with my husband, and I thought having the bed to ourselves is important(so far he only has slept in his cot once..in the hospital, in the first night. He woke up at 2:30 am, along with other babies, and did not go back to sleep). I also read that babies would develop their own way of self-soothing (and go to sleep on their own) when they reach about 2 months of age. However, it was quite a nightmare. Daiyan hated his cot and just kept on crying, which of course, eventually made me stressed. I ended up bringing him back in bed with us. After that night, I found an article about co-sleeping vs. cot sleeping in Dr. Sear's website, and the article points out that co-sleeping has been found to help regulates the child's breathing and that SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) are less likely to affect babies who are co-sleeping with their mothers. After reading the article, I felt relieved and decided to let Daiyan sleeps with us for as long as he needs.

So now, after 5+ months of becoming a mother and taking care of Daiyan, I came up with a conclusion about parenting: Do what feels right and natural, and what works for you. Of course people can say do this and that, but eventually we are the parents and the baby is living with us, so whatever we do/n't do to our babies mostly affects us, not them. As for my husband and I, free access to my breasts/breastmilk, co-sleeping, and baby-wearing (when needed) work miraculously; Daiyan doesn't cry as much, and he seems happy and content. Although the house gets messy quite easily as it's quite hard to do housework while carrying Daiyan or when Daiyan is sleeping (plus my husband and I are not that particular anyway), I think it does not really matter as Daiyan comes first, not the house.

I remember reading an article about why African babies don't cry (forgot the website huhu) and what Dr. Sears wrote in his website. Both point out that we should read our baby and give him what he needs, instead of enforcing something that the baby doesn't want (scheduled feeding, cry-to-sleep, starting solids too early etc). I also remember reading an article about why babies nowadays do not seem happy, and the article points out that probably the reason these babies don't seem happy is because the parents do not give them what they need. I happen to agree with all three articles.

I think the best way of parenting is by imagining ourselves in a cave, with no one else but our baby and husband. Only by imagining that we would start taking care of our babies like what nature intends us to, using our instinct as a mother.

 My two men <3

Baby products

Since I am a parent now, I want to share my favorite baby products that I use. Just because. Saje menggedik. haha

Ameda Purely Yours Breastpump

To be honest, this breastpump is not my first breastpump. My first breastpump was Pureen but oh my it wasn't working at all (ok, exaggerated, but you know, less than an ounce for an hour worth of pumping says it all). Plus, it hurt my breasts. After using it twice, I decided that it was not working for me, so I bought another breastpump--Avent manual breastpump. It was okay, but at most 3 ounces from both breasts in almost an hour..ermm.. I don't think so. It wouldn't be the ideal breastpump to bring to work. So after doing some research, I decided to invest in Ameda Purely yours breastpump. Why you ask? Well, the main reason was, the price was affordable for a double electric breastpump. Plus, the reviews were good. Compared to Madela which was more expensive, yet getting lots of complaints about milk getting into the tubes, Ameda sounded perfect. The tube is never meant to be washed. The milk has no way to get into the tubes, so it is less likely that the motor will get ruined. The pump has different controls for suction and speed, so I can easily change the setting to whatever feels comfortable to me. And I found out that while the standard breastshield size that comes with it is 25 mm, you can easily get a larger ones (up to 32 mm I think) or attachments to make it smaller (to 21 mm). I think the only bad review about this breastpump is that the motor sounds a bit loud, which doesn't bother me. Covering the motor with a pillow will help lessen the sound, of course. I highly recommended this breastpump!

Mimijumi bottle

I am not sure at what point my baby Daiyan start refusing bottle. He was happy with his Avent before, yet when I started going to work, he completely refused it. He would rather be hungry than drinking from that bottle. Feeling miserable, I did some research on baby bottle, and I learned about Mimijumi bottles. The bottle has received lots of good reviews from satisfied customers, particularly those whose babies initially refused bottles. So I thought, why not? The bottle looks like breast anyway, unlike other bottles. Although it is quite pricey, I bought it anyway. And Mr.Husband and I will never look back. We love the bottle because our baby Daiyan accepts the bottle without any trouble! The first time I gave Daiyan the bottle, he looked at the nipple, and immediately put the nipple in his mouth! It's like an instinct! Now I never have to worry about Daiyan being hugry when I am working anymore! Highly recommended!

Sudocream

I first learned about this cream in a parents magazine, I think. Then I was given samples of it at the hospital. After bringing Daiyan back to the house, I thought I should try the cream, and we have never used other cream since. Although it looks like any other nappy cream, it works miraculously. Once, Daiyan got a nappy rash, and it went away after only two days of applying the cream diligently. After that, he never had a nappy rash again. This cream works like magic. It comes in big tubs too (250 g), so we have only bought it once, and it lasts for months. Highly recommended!

Lansinoh nipple cream (does this count as baby products? haha)

In my early days of breastfeeding Daiyan, my nipple got so sore and sensitive and it bleed at one point. But thanks to this cream, it helped me cope. It soothes and heals the nipple, so it really relieved me. The best thing was, I never had to wash it off before feeding Daiyan! Highly recommended! (I have to confess that I have never bought the cream though, I only used the small sample tube the midwife gave me huhu)

Woolies disposable diapers

Well, the reason this is one of my favorite baby products is because it is cheap yet works well. $14 for 56 nappies ($10 for newborn) is seriously value for money. It holds liquid well (usually no problem even with 12 hours of wearing), and Daiyan never had a nappy rash wearing it. Recommended! (not highly recommended because it is disposable diapers..bad for the environment. But Daiyan cannot wear cloth diapers completely since he pees like crazy huhu so we mix. cloth diapers at home, disposable diapers for day out and at night)

Johnson's baby wipes

This baby wipes does the job properly. It cleans in only few wipes and smells good. The only problem with it, I think, is it's too wet. Usually I need to wait for a while before putting on a new diaper because I want to let it dry first, which, you see, is not a good idea for a baby boy because of the possibility of 'firing'. Oh, and I think most probably it has mineral oil, which is not recommended for babies skin, but we can't afford buying more natural alternative huhu. Recommended, nevertheless.

Hmm..I think that's all. We don't use lots of baby's products anyway. We used Gaia shower gel for his bath and Gaia massage oil for moisturizing. It has no mineral oil (like in Johnson's products), which I read is not good for babies skin, but other than that. it feels like normal baby shower gels and oils. We don't use any powder on Daiyan because..no reason (probably because we are lazy haha and it's unnecessary). Haha. But I read that it's not really advisable for babies to wear powder anyway because it may gives babies asthma or something. Oh, I don't know, but the baby may develop reaction towards it.Oh, and another thing that we use on Daiyan is minyak telon. I can't really tell if it works or not, but it smells nice. Mmmmm..

So, that's all! What are your favorite products for your little ones?

update

Oh, my! how long has it been since i last wrote in here? 3-4 months? haha that's what having a baby can do to you! :P

Anyway, I have been going back to the lab since early this month. And unfortunately, I haven't been able to do things in the lab yet. The gas chromatography (GC) machine/pc broke down, and since I rely a lot on it for my research, I cannot proceed at the moment. Getting a new one and/or fixing the old one will take months, and i can't afford to risk my research since i should finish end of this year. Having that thought in mind, i told my sv that i want to do molecular works and look at more genes instead of waiting for the machine and looking at degradation activity. So, hopefully that will work. Now I am at the primer design stage. huhu.

As for my baby Daiyan, he is doing fine. Just turned 4 months, and he will be getting his 4months immunization tomorrow. hohoho go Daiyan! Oh btw I'm still having trouble msking people say his name properly. Instead of Daiyan, people tend to pronounce it as Dianne. Oh, my! Daiyan is not a girl!

Anyway..i have to stop writing. I've been typing with only my left hand since Daiyan is on my lap, protesting about something. He was nursing before, but now he seems not interested. Oh well i wish i understood baby language. Anyway, byebye. He's sliding off my lap now. huhu

Breastfeeding

Before I went to labor, I always thought breastfeeding was easy. I mean, it's a natural thing to do, so, it should come to us fairly easy, shouldn't it?

Well, I was wrong.

The truth is, breastfeeding is hard. Even the latching is hard, if we are unaware of the way baby latch onto our breast. Thankfully I went to the breastfeeding class during pregnancy, so I was aware of the latching part of breastfeeding, but I must say, even so, it was still a bit tricky. Sometimes my baby attaches beautifully, but other times, it can be quite frustrating.

Other than latching, many new mothers will soon discover that they may not have enough milk/colostrum to give to their babies in the first few days. I experienced that. I always had colostrum, even before the labor, but it was never a lot. It was enough though for the first day, but not for the second day. On the second day, my baby cried the whole day because he was hungry. I did not have the time to sleep, because I was either feeding him, or trying to put him to sleep. When he was finally sleeping, and I thought I had the time for myself, he woke up again, crying. I remember one of the midwives felt sorry for me and asking me to express some colostrum into a cup so that she could feed the baby and I could sleep. However I could only express a drop or two. It was frustrating.

However, since I was determined to breastfeed my baby, I kept on feeding him for as long as he wanted, as frequent as he wanted. It was very tiring, especially since the labor started very early in the morning and I hadn't had enough rest since, but it paid off. On the fourth day, my breasts started to produce more colostrum/milk, and by the end of the week, my breasts were as hard as rocks because they were producing so much milk; more than my baby could consume. My baby lost 200 g on the first week (around 7% of his body weight), but it was normal. By the end of the second week, he gained almost all the weight that he had lost (3.760 kg when born, 3.560 kg after a week, 3.740 kg after two weeks).

Anyway, having that said, keeping on breastfeeding is hard especially if we are surrounded by people who are not supportive of breastfeeding, especially our own mother/mother-in-law/husband. My mother and husband are supportive of breastfeeding (alhamdulillah), but my mother was kinda skeptical/worried too much about my ability to breastfeed. The usual thing that she would do was to press my breast every time I was about to breastfeed my baby, and she would ask, "Ada susu?" She also consistently told me that it is okay to mix with formula milk, especially when I start going back to school. It was a bit frustrating, because the last thing that you need when you want to breastfeed is people doubting your ability to breastfeed (and making you doubt yourself).

Another thing that is hard about breastfeeding is pumping/expressing our milk. This is my biggest problem, because although I have sufficient amount of breastmilk, I seem unable to pump efficiently. At most I would get 3 oz from both breasts at one time, but usually I would only get 2 oz. I know I am producing more than that since my breasts still feel full even after the pumping session. This worries me so much, because I will have to go back to school soon. However, after asking around and doing some research, I found out that my inefficient pumping is due to unfitted breast shield/flange of the pump. The normal breast shield that comes with the pump follows the average nipple size; however, apparently some women need a larger size. I, however, need a smaller size. Thanks to my friend, I learned about Pumpin'Pal, and I have ordered the breast shield. Now, I am just waiting for it to arrive, and hopefully it will solve my pumping problem.

And the last thing that is hard about breastfeeding is that, it is tiring! Newborn feeds very frequently--once every 2-3 hours--and my baby feeds for a long time, usually one hour for every session. It is very physically demanding, but like my mom said, our milk is our babies' food, why denying his right to his food? So, tiring or not, it is not an excuse not to breastfeed.

Anyway, throughout my 2 months+ journey of breastfeeding, I have learned a few things. I have learned, of course, breastfeeding is hard, but as a mother, I can't stand the thought of shoving something other than my milk down my baby's throat. Looking at pictures of other babies drinking formula milk upsets me, and I don't want that to happen to my baby, at least for the first six months of his life. I feel babies less than 6 months old should not be given anything other than their mothers' milk..it's just..unnatural. That's why I am very determined to exclusively breastfeed my baby until at least he is 6 months old.

Another thing that I have learned about breastfeeding is, we, as mothers, need to be very determined, consistent, and persistent, to exclusively breastfeed our babies till they are 6 months old. Exclusive breastfeeding is not for the weak-hearted. There will always be people (especially those who are close to us--our mothers--because they have gone through the whole experience of having children) telling us that we are not producing enough milk, and we have to give formula milk and water to our babies. The truth is, no, we are producing enough milk, and we don't have to give formula milk and water to our babies. As mothers, we have to be strong and ignore these discouraging statements. The moment we fall for their words, is the moment our milk production deplete, because lactation is highly influenced by our state of mind. If we think we can't produce enough milk, than, we can't, but if we think we can produce enough milk, than, we will. We have to believe that we are capable of producing enough milk, and never to worry about it. Unless, of course, if we really have problem producing milk (will usually show in our babies' growth), then we should consult with a doctor/lactation consultant.

Some people think that breastmilk is not the best food for babies because formula milk has all these additive (DHA, etc) in it. I am not sure if breastmilk has all these components (although I believe it has), but logically, how can we possibly believe that something man-made is better than something provided by God? Plus, people formulated the milk by mimicking breastmilk, so why settle for the fake thing when we can get the real thing? And our babies need the antibodies available in our breastmilk to protect them from getting sick. Alhamdulillah, my baby has not gotten sick until now although at one point everyone in the house was infected by cough, and now i am still coughing like crazy.

So mommies, lets get stronger and exclusively breastfeed our babies for at least 6 months (aim for 24!)! God gives us the milk to feed our babies, so lets not deny our babies right to it!

p/s:  Daiyan will usually smile after breastfeeding. Yes sayang, you're welcome :)

Things I wish I knew / I'm glad I didn't know before giving birth

Things I wish I knew before giving birth

1. contraction pain feels exactly like period pain, and it is bearable, even without painkillers. (I thought it would be worst)

2. although breastfeeding isn't supposed to be painful, it is painful for the first couple of weeks because the nipple is still tender


3. pumping is hard. a good breastpump and a fitted breastshield is essential. the size of the breastshield doesn't entirely depend on the size of the breasts; it depends heavily on the size of the nipples during pumping/nursing (the size of the nipples increases during pumping/nursing)

4. we make LOTS of milk during the first couple of weeks. pump and store while you can!

5. the hard, uncomfortable feeling on your breasts is the milk! massage it for some relief and to prevent infection

6. nursing pads are essential!

7. tummy time is important for babies. let the baby has his/her tummy time everyday since the day s/he is born

8. any skin irritation (itching particularly) could be related to pregnancy. discuss it with your doctor, even when you feel it's nothing/not related to pregnancy

9. taking care of your own baby is a LOT harder than you think, even if you have experiences in taking care of other people's baby

10. poo from an exclusively breastfed baby does not smell bad!

Things I'm glad I didn't know before giving birth

1. my baby was big. I might not be able to deliver him normally, had I known he was big, because I might doubt my ability to deliver him normally.

2. ok, that's the only one. heh.

Hope this helps some mothers-to-be! Selamat hari raya aidilfitri and selamat hari merdeka!

Giving birth - my experience

( bodo punye blogspot. aku type banyak2 hilang pulak. isy )

Alhamdulillah, I have safely delivered a healthy baby boy last Tuesday, 21 June 2011 at 9:27 am, Canberra time. He was 3.76 kg, 53 cm. I delivered him normally, without any painkiller. We named him Muhammad Daiyan Zakwan.

Anyway, I am pretty sure lots of people wonder how it feels like to give birth. Usually if we ask mothers about it, we are most likely to get "it really hurts", "it's indescribable", "i felt like dying", etc. as the answers. No one really gives the answer that we want to hear. So, here, I want to attempt the impossible: to actually describe how it really feels to give birth.

Let me tell you my whole experience first.

As usual, I woke up at around 3:30 am to go for a wee. However, unlike usual, I felt like my panty was wet. Afraid that my water had broken, I woke up to check the bed. The bed and my pants were okay, so it's only my panty. I went to the toilet to find that I had passed the mucus plug, but since it wet my panty, I was wondering if the water had broken, but instead of a gush of water, it might be dripping. So, I did my thing, put on a pad, and called the birthing suite, just in case. My call was answered by a midwife, and she told me that it was normal to be that wet when the mucus plug passes through, but just to make sure, she asked me to call her half an hour later. It was 4 am.

Shortly after hanging up, I felt my first contraction. It felt like a mild period pain. I was not sure it was a contraction at first, because I didn't know how it feels like, but since it came every 7 minutes, I was pretty sure it was contractions. So when I called the midwife back to tell that I did not wet the pad, I asked her if what I felt were contractions. She said it sounded like it was, so she asked me to drink lots of water and try to go back to sleep. I asked her when I should go to the hospital, and she told me that for first pregnancy, it usually takes 12 more hours after the contraction starts to be 2 minutes apart, so she told me to relax. I was like, "okay," although really, I didn't believe her. Anyway, I took her advice, drank some water, relaxed on the chair for a bit, and tried to go to sleep. By that time, the contraction was 4 minutes apart, and was getting stronger.

However, I felt sick shortly after I got on the bed. I rushed to the toilet, and I threw up like a water hose. Seriously, it was gushing out of my mouth. On the second gush, my water broke like a popping balloon. Seriously, I thought I heard a popping sound. Haha. So I asked Ajoy to call the birthing suite. The midwife told me to take a shower and eat some breakfast before coming to the hospital. Taking her advice, I took a shower while Ajoy prepared breakfast of rice and fried egg. However, I really couldn't take the breakfast because I felt really sick. I called the birthing suite again, and the midwife told me to come straight to the hospital. At that time the contraction was around 2 minutes apart and was really strong that it made me mengerang.

Arriving at the hospital at around 6am+ , the midwife put me into a birthing room. She told me to change my pad and showed her the one that I was wearing because she wanted to see the color of the water. I knew it was clear when it first broke, but it was a bit brownish at the hospital, which indicated that the baby had pooed in the uterus. I showed her the drenched pad, and didn't even bother changing into a new one because the contraction and all the other pains (back pain, pelvic pain, pain in the thighs, etc.) was too much that I didn't even give a damn anymore. Plus, I had already drenched my pants, kain batik and car seat that most probably there's no water left anymore. So I just went out of the toilet, and lied straight on the bed. I was so tired that all I wanted to do was to lie down and sleep (but of course I couldn't haha).

While I was lying dreadfully on the bed, trying to cope with the contractions, I heard the midwife told another midwife that I was on the bed in lots of pain and that my contraction was 2 minutes apart. Not long after, a new midwife entered the room (I assumed they just changed shifts). She asked me how I was doing yadayadayada. Then I asked her how far I had dilated, and she said, "Do you want me to check it for you?" I answered yes, although in my mind I was like, "isn't it the normal procedure?" They probably don't do it here. Anyway, she checked, and she told me that I was fully dilated, and I was going to have the baby soon. At this time, the contraction got so intense that at times I just had to scream because I felt the urge to push (but I tried not to because I wasn't sure if I should haha). She asked me if I felt like pooing and if sometimes I felt the urge to push, and I answered yes. She then made me got off the bed and took a shower (the warm water really helped relieving the back pain) and changed into the hospital gown. Then she asked me to kneel on the bed. And the battle began.. (chewah)

The midwife told me to push whenever I felt the urge to push, and that's what I did. Personally, I think pushing was the only way to relief the contraction pain. So I pushed when the urge came, tried to take a deep breath during contraction, and tried to rest in between contractions (I even fell asleep a couple of times haha) . Ajoy was next to me the whole time and he kept on reminding me to breath properly. He also fed me with some ice whenever I wanted (this is a great way to stay hydrated since it's hard to drink). After a few pushes however, I stopped having the urge to push; I only got the contraction. Since it had been a while since I last pushed (approximately half an hour), the midwife told me to push hard on every contraction that I got. So I took a deep breath, pushed like I have never pushed before on every contraction that I had after that. It felt like pushing a huge poo, no kidding. Even the midwife said "push the poo out clean~" to encourage me. Haha.

Anyway, after several strong pushes, I felt the baby's head at the opening. I started to feel stinging sensation as the baby stretched my perineum. After a couple more pushes, I could feel something came out, and I screamed as I could feel somewhere in my vaginal area was tearing. However, although it hurt like hell, I felt so much better since there was no more feeling like a huge poo stuck in the bottom, and plus, the stinging sensation wasn't there anymore. A second after that, I heard the baby's voice, and I thought, "finally!". I asked Ajoy if the baby's out yet, but to my disappointment, Ajoy said only the head was out, so I still needed to push. Finally, after 3-4 more pushes, at 9:27 am, the baby was out, and I was so relieved. Ajoy cut the umbilical cord. The midwife then asked me to lie on my back, and they put the baby skin to skin on my chest. However, since Ajoy needed to azan and iqamah to the baby's ears, I passed the baby to Ajoy first, while I was pushing the placenta out. Then Ajoy gave me the baby back, and let the baby to breastfeed for the first time (which he didn't do right away because he seemed too tired. He got on the breast after a few minutes though). 

After the breastfeeding, a doctor came to stitch me up. She said I had two tears--a libial tear and a second degree perineum tear. She said she'd use local anesthetic (the same as the one used by dentists) for the stitching, but I could use the gas when she put the local anesthetic. I thought, why not, since I was done with the labor anyway. So I breathed in the gas (the laughing gas to be exact), in hope I would feel less pain when she injected the anesthetic. But boy, OMG. It hurts more than the labor itself, even with the gas. After a few minutes, she stitched me up (which still hurts, even with the anesthetic and the gas). When I asked her how many stitches did I get, she told me that I had one huge stitch. I wonder how she did it when I had two tears...anyway, she then shoved three painkillers up my bottom, and I was done.

Things after that got a bit blurry to me, since I was so tired and sleepy. I was given something to eat, and I fell asleep right after. I was then woken up by the midwife and she sent me to the ward.

So, to answer the above question:
Labor pain feels like extreme period pain (the whole set: tummy cramp, back pain, pelvic pain, fatigue, etc.), coupled with extreme constipation. Personally, I think the labor itself does not hurt that bad; it's not really about the pain, it's more to the annoying and uncomfortable feeling of being in pain and tired, when all you want to do is to rest. Maybe the most painful moment during labor is when the baby is pushing out of the vaginal opening; when all the tears happen (or not, if the baby is small or you are just lucky). However, since by that time you're not gonna give a damn anymore, all you want to do is just to push the baby out and be done with it. It hurts, it stings, because one of your body part is tearing up, but right after the baby is out, you cannot feel the pain anymore. Maybe because you've feel the worst, so anything below that (the fact that your vagina has torn) become unnoticeable. In fact, personally, I feel the stitching part is the most painful of all. And the agony that you will have to endure for weeks while waiting for the stitches to heal. So I guess, the real reason why mothers are placed higher than fathers is not just because of the labor pain; it's more because of the whole pregnancy, labor and post-labor pain that mothers have to endure just to bring one little life to the world.

And yeah, there is a thing called post-natal pain; it's the pain similar to period pain that you can feel (especially while feeding the baby) when the uterus is shrinking. The midwives at the hospital wished me luck, because they said if I could feel it now, it would only get worst with subsequent births. Oh, I guess I am not lucky. Well, I can't really complaint. I had fairly an easy and fast labor, it's only fair for me to feel the post-natal pain. I guess when you gain some, you lose some.

Anyway, that's it. I hope that answered the all-time favorite question "how does it feel to give birth". But of course, that's based on my experience. Different people might have different experience and might have different description :)

My experience during pregnancy (the physical aspects of it)

Today I am officially 31 weeks 2 days pregnant. Alhamdulillah, so far pregnancy has been fairly kind to me.

The first few weeks of my pregnancy was pretty easy. I did not get morning sickness. The closest I got to morning sickness was just gas (I burped a lot). My appetite did not change much too. I did eat slightly a bit more than what I used to, probably because I always felt tired. Other than that, life went on as always. My tummy did not show as much too. It probably started to show a bit in week 8, but it was pretty much unnoticeable under clothes. I could still wear my jeans till approximately week 20.

I think 20 weeks of pregnancy was the point where pregnancy started to affect me (physically). It was the time when my appetite increased a bit more. I had to eat slightly more to feel full. My tummy was definitely showing, to the point that I had to get a pair of maternity jeans, and for other people to start asking. My back started aching too, specifically at the pelvic area where it was once dislocated. Other than that, everything was still normal.

Week 27, the start of third trimester, was the point where pregnancy really affects me. My appetite has definitely increased. However, because of the increasing size of the baby (and uterus, of course), my stomach has became more compressed and smaller, which forces me to eat less. But since the baby is currently trying to triple his size at this stage, I am almost constantly feeling hungry (and always crave for sweet things), so I usually settle by snacking (I usually try to get something healthy like a piece of fruit, but sometimes I go for something naughtier like a donut..or two.. hehe). Also at this stage, my back and ribs are driving me crazy. They almost always hurt, even when I was sleeping. My legs cramp quite a lot too, but it only happens when I am sleeping, or just about to get up from sleeping. I started to walk like a typical pregnant lady as well..I just hope it does not worsen, though. And I usually wake up in the middle of the night too..apparently my body is preparing for parenthood, so I read.

Owh, some of you might be wondering if I have gained a lot of weight or gotten stretch marks. The answer is, yes, I have definitely gained weight, but within the recommended range. I think I got a bit of fat going here and there, but I won't say I look fat..just a bit plump. I still wear my pre-pregnancy tshirts. The only thing that I cannot fit are my pre-pregnancy jeans and dresses (of course, they cannot stretch to accommodate my tummy). And surprisingly my rib cage is showing! I did not expect that during pregnancy haha! And thank God, so far I don't get any stretch marks because of the pregnancy. Probably thanks to the Cocoa Butter Formula oil that I have been diligently wearing even before pregnancy.

And that's all so far I think. I probably left some things here and there..I will add more if I remember. Anyway, last week my midwife said my baby has already engaged! Oh! :O

p/s: will post on my experience getting pregnant in Australia later.